Spreading the love: The Pumper Poem. (replies in prose only!)

[Grover]

The night before last,
a match QB arrived -- arrived really fast!

.177 it was.  I was quick to adore.
With Air Gun Depot's sale, I was looking at more.

A QBD in 22 would be sure to delight
but my desire and wallet -- they were having a fight.

With 16 guns in the cabinet,
my reason, well, it just wasn't havin' it.

But the sale was for just one more day,
Surely...  Time to make hay.

As I sat back in my chair,
four lonely old pumpers fell in my stare.

Perched on the wall looking so pretty
not getting shot, I gazed in pity.

It was then it came upon me,
they need glass perhaps -- then we'll be happy!

In the drawer I dove yes it's true,
What did I find?  I came up with two.

So back to the keyboard I went,
I tapped and clicked with fervid intent.

Two scopes and goodies put me over the line,
the discount plus free shipping...  Indeed they were mine!

Out to the garage I dashed,
swapping scopes and mounts, making room for ones I had cached.

So rather than guns clogging my den,
I chose to improve the ones that have already been.

For tis' the season to let not be forgotten,
the fortunes around us that we have already gotten.
 
 

[Motorhead]

So here he sits trying to shoot his pump up farters ...
Such eager stroking ends in single shot blunders missing chances at bulls eye wonders !

When by chance a pellet loaded ... finds it mark without such wander is Ron so happy he simply ponders.

Ponders the thoughts of what could it be .... If shot with a NEW PCP 

More a rhyme ... but hey, it New years eve 

[Grover]

So here he sits trying to shoot his pump up farters ...
Such eager stroking ends in single shot blunders missing chances at bulls eye wonders !

When by chance a pellet loaded ... finds it mark without such wander is Ron so happy he simply ponders.

Ponders the thoughts of what could it be .... If shot with a NEW PCP 

More a rhyme ... but hey, it New years eve 

Funny, dear sir,, that you mention ponder:
Never inquired, but still pining your trick Marauder.

[longhunter]

There once was a man from nantucket,
Who shot from sticks and a bucket.
As the last squirrel of the day bounded out of sight and away, for lack of air and the bottle back at the truck.
The old man sat, with his hand rubbing his chin, muttering if this darn gun didn't cost so much, for two cents I'd chuck it.
So, off he trudged, muttering next time I'll bring the old 'dan, as I've always had good luck with it.

[avator]

Pump and pump until your arms tire,
Then pull the bolt back load a pellet and fire.
Then pump some more til your lips turn blue.
Sorry Northerners, Motorhead and I can still use C02.
Happy New Years

[UCChris]

I truly hate pumpers,
much rather a springy thumper

So much work for just one shot,
and I like to shoot a lot!

[north country gal]

These eyes ain't the best
And sometimes they need a rest
But on a good day they can cope
So don't need no stinking' scope

[robertr]

What is prose
Me don't knows
Took a guess
But forgot the rest.

[bantam5s]

My blue streak is great
His quality is first rate
My blue streak is good
He's made of brass and wood
His action won't rust
And his parts won't bust
Pump after pump
He hits with a thump

This was my first poem I have written since 2nd grade so don't be to harsh 😁 .

[mobilemail]

I thrash through the woods with my faithful Marauder
looking for one more tree rat to s-l-a-u-g-h-t-e-r
I think how well the gun hits its mark
and does it so quietly with nary a bark
But if one thing could change to bend to my will
The gun would be lighter to lug up those hills
I swear this thing should come with wheels
and a motor to let it push its own weight
and a tracking device to find the game
that had just met its fate
Lets add a coffeemaker hid in the stock
and a winch to yank me out of
the ravine where i've walked
But while I dream the squirrel disappears
So I'll just wish you all a happy hunting new year.

I beg the mods forgiveness for the second line
but the auto-correct to "eliminate" didn't rhyme!

[T-Higgs]

Ode To an Airgunner (The "Trick" up my Sleeve)

Twelve noon on Sunday
On the couch I still lie
Pondering and pining
On Airguns to buy

Which stock which style
Which caliber which pellet
I'm so close to buying
I believe I can smell it

I've done all my homework
I've searched every gate
The rifle I'll buy
Is of choice not of fate

My palms start to sweat
I've narrowed my pick
I'll soon have that rifle
With one easy click

When enters the room
My hot femme fatale
She utters the words
"DONT TOUCH THAT PAYPAL".

And all in an instant
My search was for not
My dreams of a rifle
Have truly been shot

Little she knows
Of the Trick up my sleeve
I wait till she turns
And quickly I leave

To my cave to my lab
Where men can be men
Where I am the cock
In fear of no hen

I peer at my safe
And the guns stacked inside
I grab the R 1
V-Mach and V-glide

I fondle another
Like a precision Ferrari
Tuned to the nines
With parts from Maccari

What more could I want
What more do I need
But the power of "want"
Put that Trick up my sleeve

No on-line purchase
No paper trail
I have one more shot
And it better not fail

I see in my safe
My personal stash
I'll buy that new rifle
With cold, hard, green, cash...


Thank you, thank you very much,
Higgs
(Shade tree poet)

[mobilemail]

Well done Higgs, North Country Gal and all contributors!  (so far    )

[Grover]

Well done Higgs, North Country Gal and all contributors!  (so far    )

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

[mobilemail]

Well done Higgs, North Country Gal and all contributors!  (so far    )

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

And Grover. How could I forget Grover?   

[Grover]

Well done Higgs, North Country Gal and all contributors!  (so far    )

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

And Grover. How could I forget Grover?   

Your reply didn't rhyme sillypants.

[UCChris]

Well done Higgs, North Country Gal and all contributors!  (so far    )

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

And Grover. How could I forget Grover?   

Your reply didn't rhyme sillypants.

Neither did yours, you fool!
Sit in the corner, on the stool!

[Grover]

On a poem thread I gambled,
But the eggs now are scrambled.

Once a rhyme not to score,
Then rhyme we no more.

Fun while it lasted.
Then I get blasted.

[mobilemail]

Sorry I had no rhyme,
Please forgive me this one time!
And if you say my time's not over,
I'll strive to please poetic Grover.

For yours is a talent of august kings
and I shall offer thanksgiving
that one should hold a special place
for poetry in our airgun space 

[Grover]

Sorry I had no rhyme,
Please forgive me this one time!
And if you say my time's not over,
I'll strive to please poetic Grover.

For yours is a talent of august kings
and I shall offer thanksgiving
that one should hold a special place
for poetry in our airgun space

It's all good,
in the 'hood.

[cclingma]

What is up with these ole multi stroke pneumatics
Are they really that cool
Or are we just fanatics

A streak a benji
Which one doesn't matter
I can deal with their tragectory being a little less flatter