One day when Jesus was relaxing in Heaven, He happened to notice a familiar-looking old man.Wondering if the old man was His father Joseph, Jesus asked him, "Did you, by any chance, ever have a son?""Yes," said the old man, "but he wasn't my biological son. He was born by a miracle, by the intervention of a magical being from the heavens.""Very interesting," said Jesus. "Did this boy ever have to fight temptation?""Oh, yes, many times," answered the old man. "But he eventually won. Unfortunately, he heroically died at one point, but he came back to life shortly afterwards."Jesus couldn't believe it. Could this actually be His father?"One last question," He said. "Were you a carpenter?""Why yes," replied the old man. "Yes I was."Jesus rubbed His eyes and said, "Dad?"The old man rubbed his eyes and said, "Pinocchio?"----------There was an old man who lived by a forestAs he grew older and older, he started losing his hair, until one day, on his deathbed, he was completely bald. That day, he called his children to a meeting.He said, “Look at my hair. It used to be so magnificent, but it’s completely gone now. My hair can’t be saved. But look outside at the forest. It’s such a lovely forest with so many trees, but sooner or later they’ll all be cut down and this forest will look as bald as my hair.”“What I want you to do,” the man continued, “is, every time a tree is cut down or dies, plant a new one in my memory. Tell your descendants to do the same. It shall be our family’s duty to keep this forest strong.”So they did. Each time the forest lost a tree, the children replanted one, and so did their children, and their children after them. And for centuries, the forest remained as lush and pretty as it once was.All because of one man and his re-seeding heirline.----------An older couple are working together in their home office and the old man figures out that he needs a specific business document out of the office safe...As he’s looking through numerous documents, he comes across their marriage license. Instantly, he is overcome with frustration when he realizes a missing detail.“This is terrible! There’s no expiration date on our marriage license!”The wife turns around from her work and reaches around her husband pointing at the last lines of the license.“Sure it does, right here... ‘til death.’”She continues: “Do you want to get out now or in a couple years?”
There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to becomea great writer.When asked to define 'great' he said, "I want to write stuff that the wholeworld will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level,stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!"He now works for IRS writing tax regulations.Gary
Quote from: bavaria55n on May 16, 2021, 07:11:43 PMThere was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to becomea great writer.When asked to define 'great' he said, "I want to write stuff that the wholeworld will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level,stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!"He now works for IRS writing tax regulations.GaryWhile kinda funny for it's direct implication of the reaction to the to USA tax regulations, what I find funniest is that someone thinks the whole world reads IRS tax regulations.
Quote from: Rabbit\Squirrel Killer on May 17, 2021, 11:23:36 AMQuote from: bavaria55n on May 16, 2021, 07:11:43 PMThere was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to becomea great writer.When asked to define 'great' he said, "I want to write stuff that the wholeworld will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level,stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!"He now works for IRS writing tax regulations.GaryWhile kinda funny for it's direct implication of the reaction to the to USA tax regulations, what I find funniest is that someone thinks the whole world reads IRS tax regulations. What you mean you don't have all the regulations memorized by heart. BD
What is this "Get Back" you guys keep talking about?