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All Springer/NP/PCP Air Gun Discussion General > Back Room
Got jokes? Post 'em here
Tater:
LOL, I was hoping this thread would bring you out Jeff. ;D
You usually have some good ones.
Privateer:
A farmer from Skipton sadly lost his wife. He contacted the Yorkshire Post to arrange an obituary. The couple had been happily married for 50 years before she passed away.
The farmer went to the newspaper office to make the arrangements. When informed of the cost, the man uttered, in true Yorkshire fashion, “ Ow Much? ”
“Ah want summat simple” he explained, “My Gladys were a gud ‘arted an’ ‘ard-workin’ Yorkshire lass but she wunt av wanted owt swanky.”
“Perhaps a small poem”, suggested the woman at the desk.
“Nay”, he said, “she wunt av wanted owt la-di-da. Just put, ‘Gladys Braithwaite died’”.
“You need to say when”, he was told by the receptionist.
“Do I? Well, put died 17th March. That'll do”.
“It is usual for the bereaved to add some meaningful phrase about the dearly departed”.
The man considered for a moment. “Well, put in, ‘Sadly missed’. That'll do”, he said.
“You can have another four words”, the woman explained.
“No, no”, he cried, “she wouldn' av wanted me to splash out”.
“The words are included in the standard price”, the woman informed him.
“Ah they? Tha means av paid for 'em?”.
“Yes, indeed sir”.
“Well, if av paid for 'em , am 'avin ‘em”
The obituary was duly printed as follows:
Gladys Braithwaite died, 17th March. Sadly missed. Also tractor for sale.
A woman gets on a bus with her baby.
The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!''
The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''The driver just insulted me!''
The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.''
Airgun.Sniper:
Guys the jokes...the jokes man
Jay
Tater:
--- Quote from: Jeff aka Privateer on February 29, 2016, 07:21:37 PM ---
The obituary was duly printed as follows:
Gladys Braithwaite died, 17th March. Sadly missed. Also tractor for sale.
The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.''
--- End quote ---
Nice!! ;D
pneuby:
Don't jump to conclusions, or worse....report my post to a moderator, LOL.
Just restrain yourself and read through it! 8)
There once was a man from Nantucket
Who gathered clams from the shore in a bucket.
He said with a grin, spotting a sea-urchin.....
'T'were it a mollusk, I could
SHUCK IT !
:P
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